I can recall so long ago entering into this process and will share some of the most valuable resources that I used in my journey for my own son. Many of the things I learned way back then are timeless and remain as true today as they did then. I would suggest if you are new to the disability community that Welcome to Holland is one that you should experience. You can find it here at Central Florida Parent Center (http://www.cflparents.org/presentations/holland/index.htm). This is the first step of a journey you never prepared for but now must take.
If you are reading this then you have accessed a threshold to the parent center network (http://www.parentcenternetwork.org/). You are not the first and you are not the last. you are not alone. There is a disability community out there with all the answers to any and all of the questions you may have and all you have to do is reach out and embrace it (http://nichcy.org/families-community/notalone). Making this networking connection as soon as possible is pinnacle to achieving the successful outcomes you seek on the path you must now traverse.
I can so vividly remember my own journey beginning with my son at six months falling victim to meningitis and the struggle just to save his life as I watched him waste away losing half of his body weight with no signs of improvement. I never gave up on him and he never gave up. From that day on I became the primary caregiver and a stay at home dad which included the early intervention services and the IEP process when he entered the public school system, graduated and began his own independent journey in life. All this I managed to do as a father immersed in a world dominated by mothers. As I write this and begin to relive some of these moments I feel a deep stirring of all of those deep, strong, overwhelming emotions I have managed to suppress. They are still there. The sadness, the anger, the frustration, that due to this experience will never go away silently lurking waiting at any given moment to unleash themselves on any unsuspecting professional who wants to assure me they know how I feel.
Dealing with emotions is first and foremost the hardest thing to do and the largest barrier we face in reaching our desired outcomes.